I appreciate the creative and whimsical nature of your question! However, I can't compute a meaningful mathematical average distance between "seven sleepy rectangles" and "one jealous teaspoon" because:

1. **Rectangles and teaspoons** are different types of objects (geometric shapes vs. physical utensils)
2. **"Sleepy" and "jealous"** are emotional descriptors that don't affect mathematical properties
3. **No positions are specified** for any of these objects in space
4. **The context is ambiguous** - this could be from a story, puzzle, or creative exercise

If you're looking for help with:
- A actual geometry problem about rectangles
- A creative writing exercise
- A riddle or puzzle
- Something else entirely

Please let me know and I'd be happy to help in a more appropriate way!
